Balancing your Biz & Romantic Relationship // Navigating the Expansions & Contractions of Life

We live in a society that is dominated by hustle-culture. How often do you see women working 16+ hour workdays and bragging about the fact that they drink 5 coffees before noon…

Working like this might get you insane business success, but it’ll probably also leave you burnt-out and feeling as if your success means nothing because you don’t have the energy to celebrate it.

The thing is, you can have as much determination, willpower and commitment as you want — but you can’t hustle your way to happiness and inner alignment. This has been a hard truth I needed to accept a couple of years ago when my business was rapidly growing, whilst I was burning my overall well-being, relationships and adrenals to the ground. If you are ambitious AF, you will probably feel this...

It’s so easy to get caught up in the hustle, just to get somewhere, faster.

And sure, your drive and consistency has gotten you places in your career. But reality is that professional success can’t fill an empty emotional void. It can’t heal abandonment issues. It can’t make your inner child feel seen and validated by your parents. It can’t boost your sense of self-esteem, because trust me on this one - nothing you do or achieve will ever be ‘enough’ if you can’t find that worthiness within yourself. You can’t escape your trauma through grinding - at least not long term. It doesn’t fix the root cause of your mental struggles, emotional pain and obstacles.

In fact, the more you grind, the more unworthy you will feel. You will continue in your hamster wheel until your adrenals are burned out and your relationships have fallen apart, your physical body shows you symptoms (that aren’t a coincidence, after all), and the dissatisfaction you experience despite your financial freedom will make you question if you have been getting it all wrong.

What I can tell you, is this - you are NOT alone in this, and there IS a better way to achieve professional success. In fact, there is a way to achieve *holistic* and sustainable abundance, fulfilment and contentment whilst still succeeding in your career and having a massive impact in the world.

So many of my high-achieving clients struggled with this when they first came to me. And, you absolutely don’t have to accept this as your reality and settle for this constant feeling of overwhelm in the name of success.

So, how do create *success on your own terms*? How do you get to *have it all*, without working 24/7, sacrificing your needs, overstepping your boundaries and letting your personal life fall apart?

1 - Define your priorities in a new way - by looking at your values.

Let’s start with a question: how do you spend your time every day? What do you focus on? Do you feel accomplished at the end of the day? Does what you invest your time, energy and attention into pay off? If you are like most of my clients, you have a hard time getting it all done. You struggle with determining what’s most important to you. Now, let’s consider this reality:

What if you wouldn’t look at a jam-packed to-do-list everyday? What is there was spaciousness and flexibility in your weekly schedule? What if there was more than enough time to do all the things you want to do?

Ask yourself: what matters to me most? How can I act in alignment with and make time for what matters most to me, personally and professionally? How can I ensure that I am acting in alignment with my values during busier life seasons?

What do I need to change to become more efficient and have more time for things I love to do?

2 - Have a routine in place that works for YOU & feels sustainable.

Look, I am NOT a part of the 5 am club, but I still believe that getting up 30 mins earlier than you would like to can make a massive difference in your day, especially if you are the kind of person who needs some grounding and time to connect with your body, heart and mind (let’s face it, everyone does - no one likes to rush in the morning).

To be fully transparent with you: the past 2 weeks have been a slow season in my life consisting of sleep ins, lots of flexibility, time with friends, and less work + to-do’s. We need those seasons in life, too; especially after busier life seasons like launches or handling lots of personal challenges.

To me, having a couple of rituals to mix and match feel ideal, depending on what I crave that day. No morning flow is exactly the same. Each day per week has a theme that helps me prime my brain for flow state.

At this point, I’ve been able to follow a weekly schedule that allows me to:

Make space to move through uncomfortable emotions as they arise instead of pushing them to the side for the sake of getting work things done and thus, by-passing my emotions
Make time for activities and practices that fill up my cup and support my mental, emotional and physical needs
Get the most important tasks each week done and have enough time to be creative or start new projects
Pour into all areas of my life and still not forget about myself

3 - Shift your paradigms around what success gets to look like for YOU + how you can achieve it in a more aligned way.

If you determine your level of success by the amount of $ you make, then how can you make sure that you truly *feel* successful, and not just *look* successful? Exactly, it doesn’t really work. Reality is, most of us measure success by numbers - in our bank accounts, on a scale (I recommend throwing it away and setting yourself + your body free), and anything from FitBit stats to the amount of likes we get on social media.

However, if your goal is to *feel* successful this year, and giving less fucks about how everything looks on the outside, what other people think of you, and so on… then you may wanna re-define what success means to you.

To me personally, success feels like inner peace, calm confidence (not the loud one you typically see from a lot of Coaches on Insta, even though there is nothing wrong wit that), flexibility in my schedule, slow mornings, spending less time on my phone, my ability to be present rather than living in the past or future, choosing the clients I want to work with, being able to receive and feeling worthy of it, laughing my heart out, treating myself whenever I please, having a thriving body, and aligned mind and a regulated nervous system, looking forward to Mondays… and so much more.

4 - Tap into your feminine energy to utilize the power of magnetism.

Until now, you may have lived primarily in your masculine. You may have created success by working hard, always being on top of things, working 10+ hours every day, 6+ days per week. It has been feeling damn tiring and exhausting at times. I know how this feels because guess what, this used to be me from 2017 - 2020. This is why I want you to consider magnetism. Magnetism is all about being in your feminine energy and embracing receivership. It allows you to collapse time-lines.

What I mean by that? X amount of input (ie. work hours) does NOT result in X output (ie. X amount of $). Making money gets to feel good and require less from you. I had my highest cash month ever in December 2021 whilst working the least amount of hours I ever have. I want the same for you.

This can only happen when you are embodied in your divine feminine.